Until now, I’m still (and desperately) looking for the “right one” that will love me truly as my future partner forever. However, there are some distractions that I can’t be able to find someone because of the instances that she’s not the right one for me. Someone tells me that I can’t be able to have a formal courtship to some single ladies out there because I’m “weak”, shy or whatever they’re telling me that I don’t really like to hear their reactions or suggestions which makes me so distracting and disappoint. While I’m writing (or typing) on my laptop, I don’t realize that I’ve been still single for the last 1,000 days! Woah! I can’t believe that I have still no girlfriend for thousand days (about almost 33 months or 2.75 years). That’s really a milestone for me as a single young man.
Reaching a milestone makes me happy but sad because I’m still single, having no girlfriend or love life until now. In this episode, I’m now sharing my past experiences happened within 1,000 days after the break of long distance relationship (LDR) and the beginning of Post-LDR Era. I just made my timeline from Day 1 of becoming single and no love relationship at all until this day. Continue reading “#1000Days”→
Social media has a full of positive and negative things. While some post their positive and nice messages and photos, it’s really sad that most of the people post and comment their negative things affecting our society. One of these negative things on social media is the spreading of “fake news” that really brainwash our people who are really unaware on the happenings in this world. Gosh! I really hate those who create “fake news” on social media. But how about for those who are “fake”? Hmmm…
I still remember back in 2004, just weeks before I left for the United States to become an exchange student, my adviser told me, with my close classmate, that my own world (of course, my TENT world) was fake after I was accused by a female deaf student who allegedly had a “scandal” that I was the one who spread that “fake news”. “Yan Tent, Tent na yan ha ay fake!” my strict teacher-adviser told me directly which hurt me so much about my own “world”, but I thought it was my final time that I was scolded before I shifted to the new “world” a year later. Well, I was fault during the time, but it was unfair because most teachers of that school were so biased to her (who became my long time enemy after this). But anyways, let’s forget this story because I don’t want to dig up my bad history from the past, and let’s moving on to the present. There are lots of “fakes” in this world. Aside of fake news, there are lots of fake money, fake jewelries, fake medicine, fake people (?), fake friends (are they plastic?), and even fake singles… what? Really? These are the people who are still considered as “single” but having in a relationship or girlfriend/boyfriend and pretending to be “single”, literally called themselves as “fake singles”. Singles daw sila pero may gf/bf pala! Mga pekeng “singles” pala sila! Hahaha!Continue reading “Fake Singles (?)”→
Episode 216 – Saturday, February 24th, 2018 (7725)
I don’t really understand why there’s one word that we need to do, not only for ourselves, but also to someone – love. Yeah, because this month of February is all about “love”, I know those who have love relationships out there are filled with love, love, love. However, for those who are still single, brokenhearted, and loveless like me, it feels to be hated. As we know, this month is full of hearts, chocolates, flowers, teddy bears, and more love stuffs that most ladies out there are so in-loved when guys, suitors, or even their sweethearts give them especially on Valentine’s.
As for me, I was once in-loved before when I had a (long distance) love relationship (LDR) for three years. However, when I became brokenhearted, I have also three years without any girlfriend or love relationship. There were three years of love, but there also have been three years of loveless. And speaking though, one time I was able to watch a love story of a letter sender when she had a relationship with her long time boyfriend until she found out that he had a “third party” which caused their love relationship broken after 7 or 8 years. But despite of her moving on from being broken, she later gave that guy a second chance where she accepted him again as her boyfriend for the second time. That’s what I really really hate to have a “third party” (not a “neutral” political party that is mostly seen in the United States) in a love relationship. Although not yet married, there’s always commitment when it comes love. Continue reading “Anti-Love???”→
Episode 215 – Saturday, February 17th, 2018 (7718)
Love Life Retreat is a gathering of Singles Ministry of the Feast for the single people where they meet in acquaintance sharing their personal stories especially in relationships – family, friends, and someone that they love or had loved either current or past relationships. Last year, it was the fourth edition of the Singles Retreat of Feast SM Santa Rosa where I was the one of 30 something single (and pretend to be “single”) people attending the event becoming as the fourth batch of this event held every February (as we know the “love” month). It was a great experience for me to join the event because I faced, not only meeting with new friends, but also receiving more blessings and forgiveness with God’s love and healing.
Well, I might never regret that I’m already a part of Singles Ministry. And I know it because I’m still single (for 950++ days since Post-LDR Era) and unmarried (but when will I get married because I’m already within 30s???). Also, it was a great opportunity for me to join this event because I had never attended in the past three editions (since it was started in 2014 – my best year ever). But in this episode, my mind is starting to make possible scenarios around my life. And I’m thinking… what if I didn’t attend Love Life Retreat last year? Hmmm… can I tell that I would not meet new friends who were still single (and pretend to be “single”) in the event? Or would I not meet one of them who later became my crush? Oh well… I’ll explain why I joined the overnight retreat for the Singles last year. Continue reading “What If… I Didn’t Attend Love Life Retreat?”→
Episode 214 – Wednesday, February 14th, 2018 (7715)
Last December, when it was a holiday, I was able to go to St. Clare Monastery for my usual morning prayer. It had been a long time that I went there because of my new job which is a 6-day working week within about 24 miles from my home. After praying at St. Clare, I went across to other church, St. Polycarp Parish, for my short prayer before going home. Suddenly after I prayed, I saw the bulletin posted inside the church where there were lots of couples who would get married on that parish (I first thought that they were missing people, hehehe). I just observed them who were within late 20s or early 30s and were happy to love each other exciting for their upcoming marriage. Then, I got my first thought, “Buti pa sila, getting married na… eh ako kailan kaya? After 10 years?” (“I’m glad they’re getting married soon, but for me… when? After 10 years?”)
Oh well… I’m already within 30s but why still I’m not married? Look at some of my former classmates, either from so-called “Deaf World”/pre-2004 era or “Post-Deaf World”/post-2005 era, who are younger than me. They are already married and having their children. Some of them have their love relationships (girlfriend/boyfriend) and will soon get married. But while me… just never mind! Continue reading “What Will Happen If I’ll Become an Old Bachelor?”→
Throughout last weekend, I felt some loneliness because I didn’t talk with somebody else either personal (especially at work) or thru medium like phone via text (it’s already almost dead) and Facebook chat. After my “special friend” came to restore my happiness when we began to have our chat conversation, in later days, we’re starting to decline our time to chat each other (thanks to some signal/network problems and too much busy at work). But the worst is the occurrence where no one replies me at all in which causes me into sadness (with some anger because it feels like they “ignore” me or walang pumapansin). For most of the times, I just deactivated my Facebook account (but later I restored it back) for some reason as I knew they might forget me at all. Kalimutan na nila ako, wag na sila babalik sa buhay ko ah dahil lang sa “no reply”! Sorry for being harsh, but it’s true. That’s a sad reality in my life right now, and this is the reason why I’m always ALONE in my life right now. Walang kausap, walang kasama, palaging mag-isa sa lahat! Gosh! It’s New Year, but did my friends reply me? Hmmm… That’s very alarming!
Anyways, I feel I’m just “anti-social” person because, as you know, I’m introvert where I don’t want to join a group of friends bonding together. I know I will be “out of place” (OP) if I’ll join with them who are talking for themselves rather than talking with me. That’s why, for most of the times, I’ve never joined any group of friends or tropa, particularly from the Feast, a Light Group (LG) to share their experiences and problems. But I have asked you something, am I really an anti-social person? It’s because I feel I’m just alone in my life (ever since I became single or Post-LDR Era). Being alone is the loneliest part in my life right now. Even though I have a “special friend” who takes me thru chat with some care, it might not be enough to fulfill my happiness and to get rid my boredom and stress from work (thanks to my skeptic boss) and at home.
Episode 208 – Wednesday, January 17th, 2018 (7687)
It has been days after the year 2018 started. And I’m not pretty sure if it will be a great year for me because I still have problems that carried over from last year (or even 2016 or after June 2015 – the end of my (long distance) love life). Although my happiness has been somewhat restored thanks to my “special friend” who always contacts me thru Facebook messenger, there are still struggles especially in my family at home. As you know, I have no privacy at my Tent Office which will turn 20 years old (I’ll discuss this in July 2018) and lots of distraction at home where there’s not really enough to have a free time of my own. Utos pa more! Hehehe!
And speaking of 2018, I can’t believe that it has been 10 years ago, in 2008, when I started this series where I wrote the past experiences in my life in 5, 10, and 15 years ago. I was still in college back then, and my life was somewhat better even though my father was too pessimistic back then at home. And because the year 2018 has been fresh, I just want to share the past experiences and happenings around my life within 5-year interval.
Like most of my past episodes of this series (in early January and July), I had written it as “5-10-15-20” where I described my life in the past 5, 10, 15, and 20 years ago. But this time, I’m going to add the events that occurred in my life 25 years ago (which was 1993, and most of you hadn’t been born yet). Well, before going back in my “time machine”, I will share my present life this 2018: Continue reading “My Life 5-10-15-20-25 Years Ago (for 1st Half of 2018)”→