Never Have Any Vacation

Episode 25 – Wednesday, October 14th, 2015 (6861)

Vacation at the beach...? When will it happen? And where shall I go...?

Vacation at the beach…? When will it happen? And where shall I go…?

In most modern times, people are enjoying in their relaxation after stressful days of work thru their vacation. Staying away from stress, disturbing, and noisy urban life, taking a vacation is the way to have a nice and cool relaxation. Some people are now going to the beach, visiting their relatives in the province (especially rural towns), gathering a fiesta celebration, exploring tourist attractions, hiking in a mountain, and even going to out of the country (if you have a bigger budget for it) especially during holidays. But before taking for vacation, most of us must take or file their vacation leaves at their respective offices. Of course, most of you are stuck at the workplace – within five working days in a week, rendering overtimes, and some of our fellow workers (especially in Business Process Outsourcing (BPO) industry such as call center) are forced to work for 6 or 7 days or even working in a holiday (such as Holy Week) and, the worst, without resting day (or day-off) just what I had before when I worked in Alabang four years ago. Unfortunately, most of us have not enough time to take a relax vacation probably because of budget and being busy in our career lives.

Since I graduated from college five years ago, I have never had to take any vacation in my career life. Although there were some times where I was willing to file my vacation leave from my previous jobs, it was not enough for me to have a nice vacation like going to the beach to swim, hiking in a mountain, travel further away from the metro, etc. My only “vacation” is to stay at home with my family (although most of the times are not so satisfy for me because of “toxic” and negative environment in the house). It’s not because of lack of budget but I have no particular friends to accompany for one vacation (such as hiking). I can’t invite or let some of my siblings or even my old parents to take a vacation with me because of their “busy” commitment. The last time I took a vacation with my family was in 2001. That’s a long, long time ago! We had usually gone to Batangas (my father’s home province) where there are nice beaches to swim. Unfortunately, we’re no longer to take our family vacation because of “busy” activities in the house. My parents and some of my siblings have gone to the said province only when there is a death of one of our relatives (I haven’t joined with them due of my “busy” work schedule).

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Since I came back home from my most memorable and wonderful experience in the United States (as a foreign exchange student), I have never experienced a nice vacation that makes me so relax and staying away from the stressful environment. But there were most of the times that I had missed the vacation with some of my friends:

  • During the semester break of 2007, some of my college classmates went and visited one of our classmate’s relatives in Majayjay, Laguna. They were so enjoyable when they swam in a nice waterfall in that place.
  • Around 2014, most of my former work colleagues in Alabang had their summer outing (or company outing, I mean) in one place in Batangas. I think it was the first time to have their company summer outing after days of working overtimes and stressful job. Unfortunately for me, I already left from the company in Alabang in mid-2012 after 1½ years of my stay with dissatisfaction (causing me to be “traded” like a basketball player from one project to another).
  • In summer 2014, one of my former college classmates named Jessica came from New Zealand to treat some of our batch mates to have a vacation getaway in Ilocos. I supposed to join with them (as my former college classmate and friend just called him, “royalprince”, asked me to go with him and other batch mates to travel Ilocos), but I declined because of some reasons (eventually “chubby”, one of Jessica’s close friend, joined with them, so that I decided to not join because I didn’t want to have any conflicts with “chubby” from the past (as my former college crush), and also I didn’t really want to join a “reunion” with my former college classmates because I didn’t want to recall the past incidents such as bullying because of my silent social life).
  • Recently last May 2015, one of HOT Team member (who is so mayabang) supposed to invite me (thru his text messages) for his summer outing with his team in Batangas. But I had no idea about summer outing with the team, and I didn’t receive any invites from its members (I have no longer belonged to HOT Team since). However, that was my good decision that I didn’t join with them in their summer outing because of some personal reasons particularly to that “mayabang”.

One of the main reason why I don’t like to join with some of my old friends for their vacation outing is that because I don’t want to recall the “past”. Obviously, I don’t want to see and to meet my former crushes again (especially with their own boyfriends); I also don’t want to see those who had bullied me (in school or in workplace) and had some bad memories. I know most of you have disagreed on what I have said, but I have traumatized on these incidents (especially being bullied). I just think that I’m anti-social with them, but that’s my reason, and I’m so sorry to them for NOT joining their vacation outing because of what they did to me in the past.

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In social media especially in Facebook, I have noticed that some of my friends are posting their pictures after having their vacation getaway either exploring around the country or in abroad. One of my former college professors have his time for mountain hiking. I never have experienced to hike a mountain in my whole life. Another, one of my former college classmates (just called him as “Mr. President”) has posted his photos exploring the nice white beaches and swimming under crystal clear seas. Some of my friends in a financial school have their time to travel abroad. I know they’re doing their good business to collect their earnings to go abroad (and even for their attendance in a worldwide convention). I had been there before (eventually I went Hong Kong with my colleagues), but later I left for some personal reasons. I had also been joining HOT Team of a travel group in 2013 where most of my friends (some of them are also my Feast friends) took their nice vacation in one of the high-class hotels in the Philippines in an affordable price (with discount). I had stayed with them once in a hotel in Tagaytay last March 2014 (provided by “royalprince”), but since I have never had any bonding time with them in some hotels around the Philippines after I left HOT Team for a financial school with “royalprince” (he convinced me to join with him, but later I also left due of some personal reasons regarding to his “anomalies” but not related in business). That’s why I had seen some of my friends from HOT Team posting their photos taking their time in a five-star hotel. I don’t think they spent more money for staying in a high-class hotel or travel further from the metro (like going to Batangas and Bohol recently) because they’re doing their business and already earning from what they did, but I don’t know if some of its members have already earned for their travel business because they are just ordinary people or office employees. I supposed to go back with the HOT Team after I left financial school in Makati, but I decided to not return due of some conflicts (and I don’t want to interact one of HOT Team members who is so mayabang). I have no longer connected with the HOT Team since then.

And one of the luckiest friends that have taken nice vacation was my former girlfriend (long distant textmate) from the North. Yeah, she was. During her study in college, she has already travelled some places that I have never done these before. Although she’s not as rich as other people who are able to travel using their own money, she was able to travel with some of her college friends in some places like Baler in Aurora province, Hundred Islands in Pangasinan, Seven Lakes in Laguna, and Palawan for her On-the-Job training last summer. I have never gone these places in my life. I was not envy on what she did, but I was happy for her to travel and to explore further from being her isolation in the North. Unfortunately since she’s no longer my love, I don’t know if she’s the one of the students to continue travelling some places, provided by her school, for her college course.

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Although I have enough time to file my vacation leave in my current workplace, I have no idea where I shall go to take my vacation. Where shall I go? Ni wala nang ako mapupuntahan eh lalo na wala nang ako girlfriend galing Norte. I can’t even invite some of my (close) friends because I know they’re busy in their respective jobs. I have no more “best friend” in my life for now. I also can’t let my siblings to join with me for my vacation because of their “busy” commitments, and I don’t’ want them to “parasite” my budget for vacation. I can’t take my vacation alone (probably I will get lost while travelling further). Who will be my companion for my vacation? And most especially, I must ask my elderly mother for my vacation because, I know expectedly, she will be worried for me while I’m in vacation and I’m not in home for days. My gosh! I’m already near 30s, but still she’s worried for my safety. But I understand she’s definitely my mother, and my life has been stuck on her at home while I’m still unmarried (that’s why I need to find the “right girl” for my independence).

I’m not envy for those who take their nice vacation most especially posting their vacation photos on social media, but I feel insecurity for not taking any vacation and being not socializing with other friends (because I’m a too silent person). Last year, I had been in Hong Kong but with my friends from so-called A-Team (particularly “royalprince” and the one who is so mayabang din so that I felt discomfort with them) for attending a convention, and it was only a short time (we stayed there only for 3 days). That was my only “vacation” in the last 10 years since I returned home from the U.S. I have never gone to beach (the last time was in 2001); I have never a mountain hike; I have no longer to travel further from home (after breaking my long distance relationship with my long distant girlfriend last June), and I have never taken a nice summer or holiday vacation with my good friends.

The cold holiday season is now near, and the summer season is long, long way, but I have no place to go for my vacation. It’s so sad for me to not take an opportunity for relax and feel comfortable from the stressful life, not only in workplace, but in home.

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